Lost Clothes

Looking over photos from a year ago I can always pick out clothes that I no longer have. I don't know how or why I no longer have said articles of clothing. They aren't in the washing basket, in the cupboard, under the bed, in a draw and I'm not currently wearing them under my other clothes. So where are they?


I have come to the conclusion that I must be a sleep walking super hero. Its obvious. I run to the nearest phone booth in my sleep and shed ever garment I own to return home in my Super Man underwear or something cos that's all I now own and that's all I can now find to wear.


I wouldn't mind if I knew that I'd given them to charity or to a good cause but I don't think I have. Maybe there is a guy somewhere in London looking remarkably trendy in my old cheese-cloth shirt or a fella wearing my grey vest looking like one sexy mofo.


If you do spot someone who looks too good to be true then let me know. I want my clothes back!


No clothes - no peace of mind.